Meditation for May 2nd, 2016
A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned
It costs roughly $0.017 to make one penny. That means it takes almost two pennies to make one penny. This is your economics.
When one uses pennies to read the I Ching, you are actually throwing $0.051 instead of $.0.03, so that means your I Ching is off by $0.021. Don’t use pennies for your I Ching unless you want interest on your fortune.
Some people think that a penny equals good luck, but it’s good luck and then some. That might mean you get what you want and then some of what you don’t want. Some people equate pennies with cosmic hugs, but now the hug lingers for $0.007 too long. Like a creepy uncle.
Because of taxes and confusing you with things being just slightly under a whole dollar amount, like something being $9.99 instead of $10, so buy it because it is literally under $10, we need to keep the penny. Because you, a total sucker, will fall for something being a penny less than a whole amount and that is why the penny must keep being pressed by the Federal Reserve gnomes. This is also why our economy is in ruins.
The Federal Reserve also has to keep the copper levels down and the zinc levels up due to the witches use of the penny for its copper content. Keeping the levels going up and down and never the same keeps magic users from using the coins in their magicks. Copper is the best defense against iron, which is the metal that has all but wiped magic away.
Prayer
Abe,
Your profile beckons me.
I have you jingling in my pocket.
I bought a soda for $1.06,
And I had $2,
So now I have fucking $0.94 in my pocket.
My right side is much heavier.
I am like a cat with a bell on so I scare off birds,
But instead of scaring off birds,
I’m attracting spare changers.
The sound of &0.94 is heard for a three by three block radius.
Now I’m a live person on the set of the Walking Dead trying not to let those pennies clank against the nickles alerting the zombies to come clambering towards me looking for pennies instead of brains.
I put my hand on the pocket to keep them still.
I just got a text – better read it right away…
CLANK!
“Hey, buddy, gotta penny?”
“Got some change?”
“Did I just hear a penny?”
“Gotta dollar for the bus?”
“Gotta dollar for a beer?”
“Gotta dollar for a heroin?”
Gotta dollar so I can shoot up bongs of weed?”
“I know you got change, GIVE IT TO ME!”
“Don’t fear change, give it to me!”
“Can I get a dime? I’m a bank or an auto manufacturer.”
“I know you got change, I heard it. GIVE ME SOME FUCKING CHANGE!!!!”
“Got time to hear about Greenpeace?”
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Can the soda just be dollar or two dollars instead?
Amen.
Craft
Feel a little down? Feel like the whole world is stepping on you? Need to feel just a smidge power?
Time to make ass pennies!
Take a roll of pennies and shove them up your ass. Let them marinate in there for a few minutes and then slide them out.
Do not clean them.
Leave them everywhere. In penny jars at grocery stores, around pay phones and bus ticket machines, on the street, in malls, near old people homes and halfway houses or anywhere where high traffic of people will notice and take the pennies.
These people have small pieces of your ass on them now and that means you are better than them.
Ass pennies. Maybe you’ve had some of mine.
Goal
Pennies are worthless, but they’re worth a penny. Zen, right?