Meditation for October 21st, 2016
How To Catch A Ghost
Yesterday we discussed how to become a ghost, but that might have given some people a real good idea to annoy people after they die, so it is only fair to share how to catch and get rid of ghosts.
Reburial
Dig a hole six feet deep, three feet wide and throw a smattering of dirt from the last place the ghost lived alive. This will attract the ghost and while they are smelling the home dirt like a puppy smelling poop, you rebury the ghost in dirt. You must whistle.
Candlebox
Light a candle. Put it in a jar with the opening on the bottom. When the light flickers, seal the jar and the light will snuff out and the ghost will be trapped. Sing these lyrics before removing the jar:
Now maybe
I did not mean to treat you bad
But I did it anyway
And now maybe
Some would say your life was sad
But you lived it anyway
And so maybe
Your friends they stand around they
watch your crumble
As you falter to the ground
And then someday
Your friends they stand beside as you
were flyin’
Oh you were flyin’ oh so high
But then someday people look at you for
what they call their own
They watch you suffer
Yeah they hear you calling home
But then some day we could take our time
To brush the leaves aside so you can reach
us
But you left me far behind
Now maybe
I didn’t mean to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
Now I said maybe some would say you’re
left with what you had
But you couldn’t share the pain
No, no, no
Couldn’t share the pain, they watch you
suffer
Now maybe I could have made my own
mistakes
But I live with what I’ve known
And then maybe we might share in
something great
But won’t you look at where we’ve grown
Won’t you look at where we’ve gone
But then someday comes tomorrow holds
a sense of what I fear for you in my mind
As you trip the final line
And that cold day when you lost control
It’s a shame you left my life so soon you
should have told me
But you left me far behind, yeah
Now maybe I didn’t mean to treat you oh
so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you’re left
with what you had
But you couldn’t share the pain
No, no, no
Oh no
Oh no no no no…
Now maybe I didn’t mean to treat you oh
so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you’re left
with what you had
But you couldn’t share the pain
I said times have changed your friends
They come and watch you crumble to the
ground
They watch you suffer
Yeah, they hold you down
Hold on down
Now maybe lover, maybe love
I didn’t mean to treat you bad
But you left me far behind
Left me far behind
Left me far behind
Befriend
Keep giving the ghost offerings like flowers and candy. When the ghost begins to trust you, maybe you can just, like, ask the ghost if, like, it could just, like, go away and shit because the ghost is like hashing the mellows.
Muon trap
These are the trap that the Ghostbusters used in their fight against the haunted guys. It is a atom that implodes and draws in the ectoplasm out of the air.