Meditation for December 13th, 2016
The Midlife Crisis
The classic 80s Midlife Crisis was the balding mustachioed man getting a red sports car and leaving your mother for a much younger blonde bombshell who is into Jane Fonda workout outfits.
Those days are gone. Those were kids from the 60s suddenly realizing they were 40 and that they have become exactly what they fought in their 20s: the Man.
Now days we remain children until 50. We hang on to our childlike lifestyle for asking as we can and none of that had anything to do with fighting the Man. When Bush invaded Iraq under false pretenses, it wasn’t the kids who fought the man, it was the now 60 year olds putting on their trusty berets and storming down to the local Unitarian Chirch to get organized.
The kids smoked weed, listened to metal and that became the only important thing in their lives. In fact, you might see the same guy who drank in a bar in his 20s still drinking in the same bar thirty years later talking about that one time he was interesting.
Fuck, a modern midlife crisis would be getting a haircut, selling real estate, and not invite people to a rock show every weekend in Facebook.
The kids that are just hitting their teens now, they’ll freak out in their midlife. They are doing less drugs, less underage drinking, and less fucking than the previous two generations. Bad news has beens, rock & roll is dead. Kids now want to be bored.
The midlife crisis of yesteryear is gone because by the time a person hits that now, they are going to be too old and have no savings to blow on dumb shit.
Why do you think comics, movies, TV shows, and music is all wrapping its arms around 80s and early 90s nostalgia? Because those kids never grew up.