Instagram Psychology II

As Instagram increases in popularity, I have found more psychological footprints within the pictures people post. This part two of an ongoing investigations tying social media to the person’s psyche.

Videos: Now that you can post videos, people show their lives in motion. With it comes two things, just another version of boring home videos and getting scared out of your mind because all of the sudden a loud explosion of sound emits from your phone and you were enjoying looking at pictures.

Videos over pictures is a sign of complete utter disappointment in one’s own life. He or she is not sure if what they enjoy doing and are into is what the person is really into, so they boast on Instagram a snippet of his or her life using video rather than a snapshot. A lot of times it is a video of music the videographer is attending live and wants the validation that the music he or she is listening to is in fact the music the person actually likes.

Videos are also used as a way of bringing extra attention to the person by interrupting the viewers scroll with a loud music clip who happens to be on a bus and has to apologize to everyone for the interruption. Attention seeking at its worst.

Words: Sometimes scrolling through pictures of food, cats and landscapes, I find a square with words in it. Sometimes it is a screenshot of a Facebook post, a special app that puts words into a picture or it’s a meme. Putting words in a post is a sign of sexual frustration and means that the person is not satisfied with the simplicity of a picture and therefore must communicate with language on a social network that specializes in pictures.

Pictures of Other People’s Kids: A lot of times it is pictures of nieces and nephews or the best friend’s kid, but this is a sub-conscience apology for being responsible for too many abortions – like ten or more – in the span of five years – with ten or more partners – all conceived in places other than beds or couches – and being pro-life.

Pictures of Other People Sleeping: Just plain creepy no matter how adorable they are or the pet that is snuggling up to them. This person is a predator.

Pictures of Food After It Has Been Eaten: A sure sign of someone who overeats and is completely ashamed of his or herself. Pictures of food before it is eaten is a sign of someone who lacks human connection, but food that has already been eaten is a sign of someone incapable of human connection.

Participation in #tbt (Throw Back Thursday): Posting pictures of the past, especially when it happened only a few years ago, is insight to when the person made his or her most dreadful decision. Maybe they started dating someone that sucked the very life force out of him or her, maybe when a pointless and mundane job was started or a futile and meaningless degree was started, maybe it was when the person just realized they won’t be making any real contributions to life.

Pictures of Skateboarding in Action: Means you can skateboard.

Pictures of Hanging Out with a Skateboard: Means you can’t skateboard.

Pictures of Running or Biking: Keep running or biking, but you will never ever escape who you really are. You might get that twenty minute endorphin run and that sense of satisfaction that you are better than everyone who doesn’t run, but you are still you and you hate that and the only thing you can do is keep signing up for marathons and bike races, but when you cross the finish line you are still with the one you hate the most, yourself.