The Autumn Files

Autumn is finally here and it has been raining and the wind has been blowing and people are walking around all bundled up and complaining about the cold since it’s been dipping into the low forties. The clocks have changed and now it gets dark in the early afternoon making the whole sky the color of crushing depression. It’s finally my kind of weather.

I haven’t been keeping up on this blog, and I keep beating myself up for it, but staring at a blinking cursor and trying to find the inspiration to write something I know a handful of people will read is traumatic. I have short stories, poems, essays & a couple of novels that I have easily written because I didn’t know if anyone would ever read it.

It’s been too long.

I can feel the slight change in my head and that hopefully soon I will be walking out of the fog and into being able to read, write, draw, paint, make music & anything else my brain decided to not do this last year. It has driven me to utter sorrow to not have the attention span to read a book let alone a few sentences.

I’m really excited to getting back into making this my blog again. I want to make this blog a showcase of everything I do and love: comics, poetry, short stories, essays, art and even music and podcasting. It’s been my dream to slowly create in different mediums.

It has been inspiration to watch my girlfriend creating & making the things she loves and posting them on her Tumblr. She gets excited about different projects she gets into and it’s fun to be apart of her creative process.

It reminds me that I want this blog to be positive and not a place where I just dump what pisses me off about the world. The last few days on the Internet have been a place of complete darkness. People unable to grip the reality of their world and lashing out at something to help their powerlessness over how strange and violent the world is. I believe that art is the language of love, and that is worth posting over opinions and arguments that does nothing to change present circumstances or help people grieve such devastating loss.

I have strong opinions, don’t get me wrong, but they are useless. All my opinions will do is not share love. I’m done not doing that and it isn’t easy for me to do in the first place.

I think that is why satire, comedy and humor are such great tools now with shows like the Daily Show because it softens those blows that people of this world give us. It is hard to believe that people do and say the things they do, but make fun of them helps relax us from the reality.

Sometimes humor is used to belittle people and that is where the line is. A people get isolated for the sake of a joke or to point out whom someone blames for the world’s problems. I see “smart” jokes on the internet all the time, but they can all be debunked by logic and all they do is set up a us versus them mentality. The world is full of gangs. A man crying about the government taking his money and telling him what to do and the woman who is telling someone not to say certain words because those words may harm someone are both thugs.

I used to be right all the time and a fucking thug.

The Internet lets everyone be a thug.

So hopefully I will get out of the fog and this blog will become exciting and full as we enter a new year. I hope that I will spend more time creating then sitting around trying to destroy. I am an agent of chaos, but I can be chaotic and still create. In fact chaos is more creative than order.

Meanwhile I’ll watch it rain.